Times of pain...

I have often thought that one of my ministry strengths was to help families navigate the grieving process. Today, I am faced with going through it with them. I remember in seminary that we talked about the "ministry of accompaniment" - of being with a family during the process of dying, death, and saying goodbye. It was as if this process were removed from us personally, as pastors; we are there to support, lift up, aid; we are not there to grieve. We are challenged as pastors to recognize ourselves as transients with our congregations; ours is an itinerant ministry - we come and go and simply pass through the lives of our churches. If we become too attached we risk relationships that are torn when we move to the next appointment. How realistic is this?

I have faced before, and will again, what I now face - someone I love is dying in my church. We are not related, except as members of the Body of Christ. We are not life-long friends, only 3 years in this appointment. We are not in any of those relationships that one associates as warranting deep personal grief. This is a relationship that cries out for sincere, measured, and thoughtful pastoral care. I am called to this ministry of accompaniment as a pastor, not as a participant. Who then will offer pastoral care to me? Where will I find the time and place to grieve and cry? "I lift up mine eyes unto the hills from whence cometh my help." My help, my pastoral care will come from the greatest pastor in the universe - my God...Father and Creator, the Lover of my soul.